Trying to get WAW back

[Dom R]

From your prior thread:

If only we can apply logic to emotions then things would all work out wouldn't it? If only I can show my wife that going to Retrouvaille has a 1000 to 1 failure rate that she would magically agree to go. If only things are that easy....

"applying logic/rationality" to your situation, is not the same as attempting to convince your wife to act logically.

When I made comments in that area, it was about YOUR actions and choices.
The logical thing to do, from MY viewpoint, at least, would be to do a whole lot of reading, to learn what kinds of things are effective, and what are destructive, in situations similar to yours.
I made my comments because, based by your current stated plans, either you havent done that, or you are ignoring what the research is telling you.

Based on the idea that, given a similar set of circumstances+emotions+environment, most people will tend to react similarly, this is the logical thing to do.



PS: retrouvaille has a 80% success rate. not 1000/1


PPS: The majority of both lawyers, AND marriage counsellors, tend to say that you should not be moving out of your "marital home".
ESPECIALLY when you are facing the probability of divorce head-on.
you moving out, just because she says thats what you want to do,
is not logical. It's self-destructive. You are hurting both yourself, and your marriage, by doing this.

Why should you help her "get on with the process" of divorce???
That is illogical.
if she wants a divorce, let her do the work. She doesnt need your "help" to do it.
If you choose to help her do so, then you are saying, "yes you are right, we should be divorced, goodbye".

there is a difference between "not controlling her" (ie: directly getting in her way of divorcing you) and actively participating in something you (presumably) believe is wrong/a mistake/bad (you moving out, and "helping her get done with the divorce process quickly).