Have you read any books on boundaries? (There is a good short easy intro by Anne Katherine.)
I'll have to admit I haven't read as much as I should. The only boundary thing I have "read" is a video thing made by some Christian ministers. It was really good though, although their voices make me want to sleep.
That was a good example, and I used something like it to successfully negotiate finishing the staining/finishing. I guess it all boiled down to a feeling of respect. I felt like he was disrepecting me, while he felt like I was just blowing it off. I think we understand each other a little better ... maybe. The hard thing about boundaries is not just building them, but maintaining them.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
