I hope it really helps NDDT. REST as much as you can, think about yourself and about DBing and start moving in the direction YOU choose to become a better man and maybe save your M.
I did have a better day today than I had in awhile. You people have helped me alot. I know that I will be ok, no matter the outcome. I will survive. I guess it is up to me as how to survive.
I am tired tonight, and am hoping for a good nights sleep. I need to make it a mantra to just let go. I caught myself singing the old beatles song today...."Let it Be" kinda made myself smile too.
Also another guy at work came and talked to me today.....he left his wife last friday because they are having alot of problems with her son, (his stepson 17) drugs attitude and all of that. He said to me that he is just fed up with the situation. I asked him if he wanted to lose his wife? he said no.......Then I asked him well then why would you leave her at a time when she probably needs you more than ever???? he didnt say nothing. Little while later, he gets a family emergency call and is gone for the rest of the day........now I am wondering what happened. Hope he is there tommorow so I can get an update. Funny thing is up until about 3 months ago, I could not stand this guy. But I looked past some of his asinine behaviour and do see some good points in him.....
anyways, as always I hope everyone is doing great!!
Under consideration today, I have concluded that I have alot of anger that I am internalizing.... Need to find an outlet. This anger is what is causing my sleepless nights, my torment. Working on letting it go......
I will link a thread here for you to check out when you have time, I am not 100% sure about everything in it, but maybe you can get some useful info. I know I did:
Ewe I really appreciate your support. Also thank you for the link, I am already all over that thread, it is gold!
Well she dropped off our daughter about an hour ago. Tommorow is her first day of school. She had a long list of things for me to take care of for our daughter. She is definately on top of it in that respect.
For all of the hurt and resentment I feel for her right now, one thing I can say about her is that she is a good mother. She does take care of our daughter well. Which in turn makes me step up and be a good father.
She did throw out there, that there is going to be a church service before the start of school tommorow, "so if you wanna go........be ready" yeah I am going. I will not really consider this a baby step as in the next breath she told me that sometime this weekend she plans to start coming to get some things. The move is going forward, although it is starting to feel like the longest move in the history of mankind. I was told about 5 weeks ago that she is moving.........
Being as this is daughters last day of summer vacation I plan on doing something fun with her......I think a movie...
Well tommorow morning ought to be interesting. Wife is coming over at 730 am and we are bringing daughter to her first day of Kindergarden. There is church first and I believe we are all going together, although I am sure her sister will be there.....
I have actually managed to get my daughter to sleep already, mircles never cease. Now I need to get my own azz in bed sometime in the next 2 hours.
