It will all get better. You do need the Retrouvaille. Congratulations on getting him to agree....that is a huge step.
Dr. Zhivago is my H's favorite movie. I wonder if it is the 2 women thing. It is, after all, just a romantic story set in historically exciting times -- not a biography. It's supposed to tug at your heartstrings, not be a sad reminder of your own life. But, what is, is. I love your statement that it would all be better if he were blind. LOL.
Yes. It is amazing that what you have to do is let him get away with the affair. When I told my friends what was going on with us, they all were dumbfounded when I got to the part about well, I just had to forgive him. Life isn't fair. I still do sometimes want my revenge, but I have held myself in check. And I will continue to. Life is too good to mess up.
The good thing is that Retrouvaille will make explicit all that you went through, and how open you are to forgive him. It will not just be something done silently, without any recognition of your hardship and your goodness. My husband would never have accepted me telling him such things. But when other people told it to him, he understood and valued it. That made me feel a lot better. (That and a beautiful new necklace that he bought me for my birthday.)
Good luck. Please let us know how the weekend goes. There are a lot of people here interested in it.
