Your other topic is locked. I am antisocial when it comes to the internet. Is that paranoid or have I watched one too many Datlelines? Beside I will probably never get to visit Boston, so drink a lager on me!
Morgan, I wanted to share with you something my D's TH said about them meeting the OW. She said that children view that person as part of the betrayal process. Her doctor said that it looks as though their married father chose a mistress over them and the children take it personally. By condoning that behavior we teach our daughters to accept adultery in a marriage and that is wrong. Ideally, a married man needs to say what he has done is wrong and that he feels remorseful. She mentioned that the marriage need not end but that the affair should not be condone openly if the LBS is not allowing it. Your H and my H forgot to do that part!
No, he cannot allow his children be part of that depravity. Should we allow them to go to an AA meeting? Or on a gambling binge? Or to a rated XXX parlour? He is living a lie so why drag his family into that mess?
That truly sucks and you need to stand up, Morgan! Stand up now and maybe that will mean stop DBing, I dunno. It is a harsh decision but we need to stop the cycle of condoning adultery for our kids. I am pretty biased though. I think DBing and Marriage Buliders Plan A say to be patient and act as if, to agree with everything and not to expect anything. But we have kids! And I am kind of weak. It sounds like you truly love your H and want him to be happy but he sounds like a sick person who does not understand consequences right now. Say no and continue DBing if you see an intact family as your Northern Star. He will thank you later and if he doesn't, screw em.
Who am I to tell you what to do but it is making you miserable. The psychiatrist told me that H is acting as though I do not exist. Is your H acting this way in regards to your feelings?
Edited by mkultra (Today at 09:14 PM)
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
