Havn't been here for awhile, update.

[81388*]

Update;

JC session went reasonably well. Had a funny moment when C was asking about our early relationship, and W and I just looked at each other a said "I don't remember, it was so long ago." C seems good, very focused on communication and behaviors and where they come from and how they are recieved. Perhaps a little too much "what happened in the past" for me, but I am sure that is part of the problem as well.

My wife had a chance to vent about a lot of things, and for the most part that was good, I continued to validate and be supportive, but at the same time was unsettled that she was still so focused on things that happened more then 20 years ago. At times is felt like she was still saying that she has known all along that it would never work. The other problem was that when the C asked what it was we were looking to accomplish, she sounded as though she was looking for someone else to tell her wether or not we had a chance. She did back track and say she was also hopeful that we could find a way forward together.

It seems like it is so fragile, and I have to continue to work at not walking on eggshells. I only called her on a few statements, along the lines of "I wouldn't agree with that, or I don't think I never,or always etc." For the most part I continued to smile and wave.

I am having trouble with OM issues, and don't lnow how hard to push. She has no contact other than work, had said she would discontinue that part of her job that brings her in contact with him, but has reversed course and decided she doesn't want to give up that part of what she does. There is still stuff at her place from him, and although it is boxed and out of the way it is still obvious and it is really hard to be there and not think about it. I would really love to just say get it out of here, but I am not sure that is the right move at this point. As for work, she has worked really hard to get where she is and I don't want to be the reason she can't do that, but at the same time it brings her in contact with OM and that just drives me crazy. Guess I sit on it awhile longer and see what develops.

Let me all know what you think.