Took the kids to the IL's house. They swam while I had a talk with MIL. Told her everything from the beginning. I don’t think she had been aware of our original marriage counseling session. It sounds like W painted a picture where I was unwilling to work on the relationship and put all the responsibility on her. We talked about the current counselor and I told her that she is okay, but I’m not getting a lot of value from it. She told me that I should go out and find another counselor. Keep looking until I find someone that provides me the support and advice I’m looking for. I don’t think she was aware of the situation with OG. She seemed surprised by that. She remembers W and OG playing together when they were really little. Overall, she seemed to want things to work out between us, but I think she is really trying to stay neutral. Probably better if she doesn’t try to push anything. Talked about her situation with her ex and how similar it was to ours. Told her that W is now looking at her mom as a success story for a divorce as she is now remarried.
Met with a lawyer today just to get some info and see if sitting back and waiting is the best strategy. Talked about child custody. Told him it looked like she was looking for 75 / 25. He wasn’t surprised at this because it fits with the child support formula for most time for me and most support for her. If I were to go higher on nights, the support would drop. He recommended thinking about the kid’s schedules first and see how everything would fit before trying to shoehorn them into some mathematical equation. Told him I wanted to continue working on things and asked if it would be wise to just wait for her to file. He said that he would recommend that at this point. It wouldn’t jeopardize anything from my point. Also asked if it would be wise to move out. He said that too would be okay, as long as we had a childcare plan in place. I feel good that I’ve at least taken the first step to protect myself.
Evening with the W was not bad, probably cause we didn't talk. Home now. W never touched her cell this evening. It stayed in her purse all night. That’s the longest I’ve seen her go without using the phone since she first got it. She was also very busy doing housework tonight including laundry and cleaning our bathroom. I was expecting her to ask about my talk with MIL, but she never brought it up. Slept in bed with W. Some small talk before falling asleep. Actually slept soundly through the night.
