thankyou all for your replies, we don't have a home to move to as yet, apparently I am near the top of the housing list with the authorities, but it is all so slow. we don't shed tears anymore for xh, we've come to realise that he is indeed an ass and someone we don't want in our lives, both son and me have said we could be his friend but that is all.Snodderley can I just say that in one of my threads you pointed out that in a year or so he would start looking at what he has done, do you not think that now, it was maybe about september time you wrote that, not that we are wanting him back we just want him to stop being so bloody nasty to the two people that never did him any wrong, why is it that he is still taking it out on us two, could it be that he doesn't like it that we can survive without him, who is he going to take it out of once we have moved and he can't find us?
