Ok CeMar...he we go again for the zillionth time! Write this down somewhere this time please.
Quote:
Just exactly how can the pain be stopped? I really have no desire to take any drugs. If lack of affection is the CAUSE of my problems, how is the shrink going to change that?
NO ONE ever said that just because you see a shrink that you will be put on drugs...a shrink isn't just going to dole pills out willy-nilly. If they are prescribed it's because you need them...and a shrink would have to have recognized something in you that was imbalanced. There's a good chance no drugs would be prescribed...are you afraid they would tell you you need some? There is no shame in taking meds if a shrink finds a medically sound reason for you needing them.
But beyond meds shrinks TALK to you, and get this....they expect you to talk back, open yourself up about your feelings, get down into your emotions and dredge up stuff that actually does affect how you interact with your wife, how you come across to your wife...bla, bla, bla, bla. They HELP YOU, and they help you learn to help yourself, they help you learn MANY things that you may not even realize about yourself...are you afraid of what they may find?
You will never know how they can help you though until you get off your azz, make and appointment and find out for yourself. Gonna do that...or not? If not, then in my mind you will be proving absolutely that YOU are not willing to help yourself or your marriage (whether you choose to see a shrink or a licensed therapist). So I guess what I'm saying is...I understand you are in pain, I get that...I really do...but put up or shut up. Do SOMETHING to help your situation and yourself...or quit bitching about it. Honestly it's really pretty simple...nothing is going to change one whit, unless you decide to do SOMETHING.
You're a religious man CeMar, so you should be oh-so-familiar with this phrase "The Lord helps those who help themselves"....so, what are YOU going to do to help yourself? Doing nothing is not helping. It hasn't helped in the 3 years you've been on here. Do you want to find yourself in this same spot in three more years, 10 more years...15?
