Frank - you sound like a wise man. I really get confused on things -- today I could fall down, so drained. H gives me the speech (after 2 months of OW) when he was home (OTR driver) Pulls me to his lap, drags me to the couch and we just embrace all night. Next 2 days we are together (cycle rides/sex/hugging me/etc) then he hugs me when I leave for work -- emptied out his dresser, says he'd be in contact more often to see how I'm doing, now wants to take over some bills so I dont' have to stress myself more than what I am (nice guy eh?) So..since he's gone most of the time you'd think I could handle this better. I'm just devastated. I feel I should have been the one to say "it's the end" not him, I don't think he should be able to call it - he screwed up. MLC is confusing--going to a shrink - helping a tiny bit. I loved being married. I love him. The strange part is that EVERYONE except him, didn't see it coming. We both were good to each other, he's got this mindset that he's getting old and apparently not going there. He calls--we talk as if all is well, then he drops little bombs like splitting the bills. Too much of a reality for me. We had talked about putting our marriage on the back burner cuz my sister was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and I got enough on my mind. Then he calls. I don't know how to talk to him , we talk as if all is well--me thinking what you did -- "nice person" and might win him back. That don't work. He wants to be free. OW has 3 kids, jail record, lives with parents. I'm thinking he won't want to raise a family since he's already done that..but who knows. I'm venting and sooo sooo misrable cuz I just don't get it. I want to give it another month or so then say, see ya...maybe by then I'll mean it.
H is OTR driver - 48 Me 49 married 24yrs 2 sons, 22/20 H going thru MLC
