Plank removed from eye, too late for WAW? 4

[waw1978]

Hey H!

Just getting caught up on your sitch. Congrats on the new place. I hope you enjoy finally having a place all your own, something positive for you to enjoy out of all of this. Sounds like you have really got the hang of detachment and are moving on. Hang in there. Love the idea of you working with the girls to decorate their new room. I think they will love it too. I know where your coming from on your W wanting to be apart of decorating the girls room. I know I am in a similar sitch with my H. He was very concerned about what I would be buying and decorating her room with. He didn't want certain characters being allowed...he was afraid that if D had her choice that she would not want to go to his house anymore cause she would like her stuff at Mommies house better. I sort of see the point but I caved and just got her neutral stuff...no where near the character ridden bedroom at our house. But this was a concession on my part none the less.

Let us know when the big trip to Best Buy happens. Boy you even got me wanting to head there! Nothing like watching some SATC reruns in HD

[Heimlich]

Sounds like you have really got the hang of detachment and are moving on. Hang in there.

Getting there. Doing a MUCH better job of keeping the love that I still feel for my W bubbling to the surface around her. Feeling pretty good about where I am. Have hope that things will work out, but no real expectations that they will. Preparing to live like it's not going to happen and still trying to come to grips with what that is like.

We ordered bunk beds for the girls yesterday, one that they like and will work really well for the room, has a desk and some shelving/drawers included as part of the bed itself. More expensive overall, but don't have to buy those additional bits of furniture. And, with that purchase, that's it for W's inolvement in buying stuff for the apt.

Funny how your H is concerned that D will like your place better. The thought has run across my head as well, just because this house is their "home", but I know that we'll have a lot of fun together. Also, next time the Disney store has a sale, let her pick out a favorite character for her room. THe hell with what your H things. His opinion doesn't matter on that.

OT/Donna,

Good advice on the purchases by my W. I don't agree with your analysis of why my W is doing this (not for ego reasons, just doesn't seem like that's where she's coming from. Could be wrong, though.) At any rate, moot point on her motivation. I'll be buying the remainder of what's needed for the apt solo.

Hinting that you won't know where to put stuff is not direct. This is direct: "W, I prefer to take care of that stuff myself. Thanks for thinking of me though, I appreciate it."

yeah, after I asked her, a variation of this thought flashed through my mind. 17 years of sharing opinions with another person though, man, that is a hard habit to break.

That is when she might start to miss the role/place that she played in the family.

Thanks, Donna. Makes a lot of sense to me. It'll actually be nice. Unlike most guys, I LIKE to shop.

WAW,
We split our cell account yesterday at Best Buy. Both got Razrs for 20 bucks. Seems to be a decent phone so far. Closing in on my TV selection after ogling them for a while yesterday. Will probably bite the bullet this weekend. Labor Day Sales!

BD

[waw1978]

I have a RAZR too. I like it better than the last couple of phones I have had. Its no StarTac but they made me get rid of that when cells went digital...apparently I am the only person on the planet that was begging to keep my analog phone! Nothing has really compared to that until the RAZR..IMO.

Well I hope you enjoy your retail therapy. I know I have enjoyed mine. Except for all the assembly from IKEA...I cring just thinking about assembling another peice of furniture. Oddly enough my daughters bed was the most challenging.

[Heimlich]

Yeah, I only got a cell phone two years ago and that was only so that I could coordinate when the W and I went separate ways with the girls as they got into bday parties and whatnot. I'm with you, I was perfectly content not to have one.

I'm pretty good about putting together furniture, but I'm pretty happy that assembly is included with the girls' bed. It's friggin' huge.

BD

[alk24]

Just noticed that my last thread locked. Thanks, Mandi, you popped my, er, you were my first

Oh my goodness!!! I *was* going to say I was sorry about locking your thread.

Getting there. Doing a MUCH better job of keeping the love that I still feel for my W bubbling to the surface around her. Feeling pretty good about where I am. Have hope that things will work out, but no real expectations that they will. Preparing to live like it's not going to happen and still trying to come to grips with what that is like.

That sounds awesome. Good job!


p.s. The verizon EnV is the best phone EVER! I love mine, I can text as fast as I can type.

[delia]

Every year for the last 12 years, go on a canoe trip with a fluctuating group of people.

Just wondering what your buddies look like when they're fluctuating... and that conversation with your wife, about you wanting to get out and think---so perfect!

[Heimlich]

Thanks, Mandi, refraining from further rude comment.



Delia,

How about, "a group of people. The number of that group fluctuates from year to year."? Of course, many of us fluctuate between sobriety and various states of inebriation during the float down the river.

I hope that conversation was perfect. I did mean it. I've been treating the basement like my own little apartment for the last week or so.

Oh, before I forget, for myself, on the 'touch count.' Putting the girls to bed last night, was kind of standing in the doorway of our youngest's room. I was out of the way so she could've gotten by me, put her hand on my belly and kindof patted it on her way past.

Also noticed her really looking at me while at dinner last night. Talking to the girls, caught her staring once or twice. Don't know if it means anything. I'm reminded of one of CVA's threads, when he mentioned his W commenting on the french fries. Parsing every little thing for meaning is kindof nuts, but it's hard to stop from doing it. So, 'French Fry Moment' or sign of my W wondering about why she's doing this? No clue.

BD

[savingus77]

I am sure it is. Whether she would ever voice it or not, she is making a life-changing decision & I don't think she would be able to do so without having doubts every once in a while. Keep up the good work - it will definately keep her thinking...

[Heimlich]

Thanks, Saving. I certainly hope so.

Got my apartment keys today. That's a little wierd. Have a new place, but won't move in for about a week. Very strange standing there in empty rooms knowing that I'll be living there for a year (possibly less, hopefully).

On the good side, the bunk bed for the girls fits perfectly with plenty of room left over. Also, lots of room for a 42 inch HDTV.

Well, time to start the picnic and see if the W decides to come out of her castle. Good analogy since we're taking the girls to the Maryland Renn Fest on Monday; hopefully not the end of an annual tradition for the four of us. My W mentioned that our oldest had asked about going. I said that I don't have a problem going (can't remember if I said as a family or all together) do you? Nope. So, we're going. Also asked her if she could watch the girls Sat or Sun so that I could go mattress shopping. Want to say she looked a little surprised, like she thought she'd go with me for that.

BD

[Atlas]

Heimlich,

The surprise on her face, when you stop chasing and start moving on they can't believe it. I know that look for sure. Keep doing it and soon the "hey look at me" look will come.

Good work on handling things well with the kids.