IF my W EVER really loved me, she would have openly discussed her feelings, gone to counseling and worked on the M. In the end, she only really loved herself.
It may be very similar in your case..........
WOW, I can relate to that. My former W dropped the bomb and walked away with that smug look and confident it was all my fault. Where was our love, her commitment?
But what does it matter their motives? If she lost her love or she just used me, if she blames me and not herself, if she loves only herself, so what? That is her problem, not mine. I cannot control that so why suffer.
I do believe that if I would have extracted my head from my anal cavity sooner it may have made a difference. But like you state so well, if we were used and they are that self centered it may not have made any difference at all.
And to sleep even better: if we were used and they are that self centered they did us a favor walking away.