Thoughts on phone calls

[Dr.mom]

Your tone on the phone is everything. Not annoyed, not detached. Just present an air of calm, zen-like serenity. Your Wife should leave the conversation feeling calm, soothed and happy.

Don't be excitable or puppy-dog happy when they call, but don't seemed pissed off. That is not the point of 180 or GAL.

I would write these words on my desk near my phone to remind me;

"Zen-like happiness"
"Calm"
"Placid"
"Agreeable"

No, you should be nowhere near the going dark stage. You need to work on YOU and she needs to see/hear it as much as she possibly can.
Some of us are just a little further down this road than you are (unfortunately) and have to take more extreme measures.

Get ready to expect the following comments from your wife (I think we all got these in one form or the other):

"I see your changes, I hope they are for YOU and not for ME"

"I see your changes but I don't think they are real"

"I see your changes but I don't think they will last"

"I see your changes but it is too late"

Keep working on you, your goals, and stick the course. Don't work on them for the results alone. Keep working.