What the whole situation comes down to is this - you make a decision. Your decision is whether you will wait for her to decide what she wants from life. From there, you go with the flow. I don't know if back off is the proper word because if you decide to wait, you are basically on her schedule. By going on with your life, you make plans to do things on your own or with friends. When she asks to do something, you have plans. This isn't to stick it in her face, rather you have plans and you may or may not tell her...end of story. People tell me I should back off, but I still talk to the ex every day and still go over there for a dinner virtually every Sunday. On the other hand, I do things on my own too, i.e. I live.
The process of coming to this board is a process of finding equilibrium in your life, balance per se. Our systems have been thrown in disarray and it is difficult to get back to our equilibrium point. All we can do is keep working towards that.
