Since H was gone, I thought I would try to find the letters I had written him and post them here.
on 7-1 (that was the month he wanted me to leave with the kids to my moms and I was really scared, but he wanted to make sure what he was starting to feel for me again was real--and by the end of the month he text me to say he wanted me to be his W forever!)
Dear H
Hi! \:\) I hope you had fun with all your old friends, I'm sure they were glad to see you! I also hope that we had fun too ;\) <I can't remember what it was we did> We haven't had fun with each other in a long time. When I wrote you th note (fathers day) that said "I'm listening now" I meant that. I totally agree with you that things have been miserable. M is so routine that we fall slave to it, forgetting that the relationship between husband and wife is the most important part of it. I know I did. I am never going to go back to that M. In my mind, that M is over. I would love to start a new M with you. One that's fun & exciting, full of "play", going out, doing things for ourselves alone or together. & of course, crazy sex! & most of all, respect.
I don't ever want you to live in a M that we had. You are so right.
I am constantly praying for you day and night, and I will continue praying for you w/o ceasing. < I need to keep back up on that promise!> You are such a special person. The Lord has so much love for us, and His love is unchanging, unwaivering and constant. We as humans are so unreliable. God is the only one whom we can trust. I thank Him so much for opening my eyes. No matter what happens, I am excited for what plans He has for me, because I know they are perfect.
I pray that God will show you your perfect way. In Christ's Love, Crissy

At that time, he was having the A, but still halfway living at home-and showing positive signs but it was very soon after him telling OW he thought she was gorgeous. I know many people probably say this anti-DBing, but I don't think so. My H actually said that the letters did help. I guess my point of the letters was to let him know he was right, and the reasons I was changed.

Me 33 H 34 S9 S3
M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs)
EA/PA 1/2006
DB 5/2006
H wants D 6/2006
H wants ME 8/2006
H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006
H erased OW off phone! 2/2007

"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."