Tell him counselling is a condition of staying together. If he cares about you as much as he says he does, he will do this for YOU and for your R
Been there done that for a year. I don't believe he'll go. But I'm not going to assume anything, I'll ask, it can't hurt. I know if he does agree, then he'll sit there on a log just as before. I'll vent, I'll talk, he'll listen, then come up with his logic and when the C sees through this, he shuts up and seems embarrassed. It's not a pretty scene. It goes round and round.
