Pros: - if he lives there he can spend more time with your child - good for your child and for their bonding. - if he lives there you will have more opportunities to demonstrate your changes - if he lives there he will have more opportunity to see you in your sexy lingerie - if he lives there you will have a built-in babysitter - if he lives there, you will have more of a chance to make him jealous by going out and letting him wonder where and with whom you went, and why you're coming home at 3 am. (It's amazing how often those with "no feelings" suddenly find them when they realize they're losing the LBS).
Cons: - if he lives there without truly committing to working on the marriage, how will you deal with him going out on dates or bringing home dates (not OW, but new women)? - if you decide you're done with him, how comfortable will YOU be going out on dates and bringing them home with your H right there? - if he gets back together with OW he will likely break his promise not to have her there
It's a tough one, for sure. You'd like to encourage his positive behaviors, but taking him back if he's still in the mindset that he doesn't feel anything for you and isn't working on the marriage usually leads to repeat bombs.
Perhaps you should tell him "gee, H, since you've made it clear you're not interested in working on the marriage, I think it would make my dates too uncomfortable to have my EX living in the building".
