I know if I don't move out it will definitely be harder for me to work on myself. When I see her there all the time it will be tough for me. Also, she will have anxieties and not able to just think on her own. I'm very certain that she will want a D immediately if I don't give her the space. Yes it would be nice not having to move out. But it's not a reality for me. She knows I have changed and she truly believe that. The only thing stopping us is her getting over her resentment, not whether I am treating her right. She can see that I'm treating her right in the past 3 months and has said so herself. It sure hasn't made any progress on her part.
We are not on bad terms. Despite her resentments she really loves and cares for me and I can tell. She is not being mean or vicious towards me. She is a very genuine and caring person. I am not worrying about the house or the kids. Everything will work out fine no matter what. She will not screw me over just like I'm not going to do the same thing to her. You have your opinions but I think I know my W better than anyone here.
As for the EA, it was her xBF. He's in Chicago. She sees no future with him. He's really a loser that can't even get his life together. It was really a superficial thing. She was vulnerable and he just swooped in. The kids is the most important thing to her. Sadly they come before me since they have arrived. But she will do what's the best for the kids (yeah I know, keeping the family should be it but....). We will work it out. You guys will think I'm insane but I will make sure my kids are taken cared of no matter what. I am not being an idiot when it comes to this despite what you think. My children comes first in this.
I will think on this a bit.... As I said, not moving out will not improve the situation. It just makes her resent me more. She really wants to see once I'm out if she would miss me and has feelings for me. Believe me it ain't gonna be fun with a 1.5 yr old and a 4 year old. She isn't going to get a sitter for anything. She'll be home most of the times. If I come by and give her a break once in a while, she might appreciate that. The kids are already driving her insane and that's when I'm doing everything I can to help her out.
I just need to detach and work on myself. Otherwise I cannot keep my sanity.
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
