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((((SueS))))
I'm so sorry to hear of the hell you've been put through.
Where is your current thread/post? I will hang at your post soon.
Thank you.
BoB

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Bob--

I'm here in Infidelity. My thread is Get Me On A Smoother Ride....Need Advice. Sorry, I don't know how to do the link.

Thank so much!

-SueS


ME: 42, H: 42, D6
Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs.
Attended Retrouvaille - December 2009
Status: Working on it day by day
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SueS,
I'm reading it right now.
Got some ideas for you.
I'll post them at your thread.
BoB ;\)

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Originally Posted By: SorryDog
Thanks bro that is a bunch to chew on, alot of good stuff...I am heading out the door right now....I appreciate your time and thoughts I will get back w/ you soon....SorryDog....thanks again !...are our brides ever going to wake up from all of this ?...I tried to PM you ...your full...


It seems that PM here is not functioning. I have set up an account here:
bobelina1234@yahoo.com

BoBeLiNa ;\)

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Originally Posted By: bobelina
SueS,
I'm reading it right now.
Got some ideas for you.
I'll post them at your thread.
BoB ;\)


Bob- Thanks. I'd appreciate it. I'm up for any new thoughts, suggestions. Having a hard time concentrating at work today.

SueS


ME: 42, H: 42, D6
Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs.
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SueS,
You are welcome.
Go here also. I have a collection of stuff starting up:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1173890&page=0#Post1173890
BoB ;\)

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Bob,

Well, I think the court will help determine custody scheduling. If your wife is flaking out on picking them up make sure you keep a record of that and bring it to court. You may be able to reduce her custody... any chance your wife might give up her half? (My mom had 100% with me when I was a kid... I personally think kids in one place is healthier and during my divorce pushed for as much as possible... we were doing the 80/20 split... every other weekend with dad...)


There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
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Root,
So far, the kids are mostly with me. They've last seen their mom on Tue. They had stayed there overnite Mon. Before that DD8 had stayed with her mom Thur nite and DD12 came home Thur nite. DDs each have cells and they can talk with their mom during the day.
Most nites they are here. They see there mom maybe 4-5 playdates during the week(?). I'll check my notes later. Stay overnite maybe 2 nites(?).
I'm letting things ride as their mom will hang her self. She's said to a friend that she'll do whatever it takes to keep me off her back so that she can see the kids. Whatever. Still that attitude of defiance. Again. Whatever.
I would prefer 100%. Period. I'll be patient and see what happens between now and court date in Nov.
My DDs are safe with me. They have now the oppurtunity to live a far better life. And I don't mean to sound like a d**ck by saying that. I've just come to the conclusion that their mom's world is just plain and simply unhealthy for the girls.
As something SorryDog and I were talking about, as the father, I am the leader of the household, ultimately responsible for it's well being, and at this time I must make the desicions that best serve my family (DDs and I).
(Hope that didn't sound too harsh \:\) ).
Thank you again.
BoB \:\)

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Hey Bob,
Check your email. I sent that article to you.

Kim




Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are.
-- Bernice Johnson Reagon


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Originally Posted By: bobelina
I've just come to the conclusion that their mom's world is just plain and simply unhealthy for the girls.


Well...hopefully they won't have to live 50% of their lives in that enviornment without you there to protect them from her bad life choices or decisions. Hopefully you can somehow convince her to give up as much custody as possible... maybe point out that she'd have more time to date, have more "fun," be less burdened with the kids, guys will like that she's unencumbered, etc... Take advantage of the fact that this lifestyle is still fun for her, eventually it won't be. But use it to your advantage now.

Sadly, I do see kids in these situations (a parent involved in unhealthy life choices) exposed to stuff I would never want my own kids exposed to.


There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
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