Well, you need to think of the girls too. If H moves back in and then decides "nope, not gonna work" and moves back out, they are going to be confused.

I am somewhat torn on the answer though, but I would say start "dating" first. See how things progress and if he's truly committed to working on getting your M where it needs to be.

He could move back in and then just be resentful for feeling "forced." He needs to figure out what he really wants before things can move forward.

I guess my answer would be to wait for awhile. Just softly and lovingly say that you think it might be beneficial to date for awhile and get your R rekindled and then move toward working on your M, does that make sense?

Me: 38
H: 35
S4, S5, S10
Bomb 01/07
Wanted D - nothing would change his mind
Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb
Piecing 04/07
Deployed for a year 05/07
Still Piecing 2010
M 11 yrs 05/10