Start looking HOT. Work out at the gym, lose weight if you need to, lift weights, buy new, more stylish and attractive clothes. If you have any grey get your hair colored, maybe highlights, go for an attractive style, shave a mustache or grow one, look at ads in magazines and try to emulate how some of the models look or dress. If you have a friend or relative who is good at style let them help... looking good helps one feel good and it sometimes get's the WAS doing a double take and thinking... hummmm... he's looking good... and then later.... why is he looking so good?
That will help with mystery. Also, being BUSY and HAPPY.
I know you are probaby feeling completely shattered inside. But the brain is powerful. By thinking positive and happy, you can make yourself happy. You can choose happiness or unhappiness. For you and for your kids choose happiness. And here's something difficult that may help.... Be loving, strong, happy and supportive to your wife when you do see her. Tell her that you "wish her happiness." This generosity, selflessness and giving will mean a lot. And she will be losing it. (This does not mean to be generous or selfless legally or finanically... only emotionally).
Also, if there's any VERY REMOTE chance of this divorce not going through. She won't stop it if there's bitterness, blame or unhappiness. You, your family, and your home have to appear, and feel, like the "best" place to be. Make it wonderful...
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
