Agent99, if a vibe makes you enjoy sex more you should get it. Also, it's basically you get what you paid for. The more expensive, the better quality. http://www.blowfish.com/catalog/ has good reviews. Some men may get their ego bruised, but that's just selfish. I get my W whatever she wants if it makes her happy. Heck, I haven't done much else to contribute to her happiness. After the kids I am not able to get her to orgasm during intercourse any longer. And I am not ashamed to admit that I am not that well equipped. Of course her vagina has stretched so much that it takes something 7-8" to get to her g-spot. Who the heck has that? Now mostly she can only do it via clitoral and only with a strong vibe. No sense in getting down about it, might as well make it part of the fun. If you are one of the lucky few that can do it without other assistance then good for you. I read somewhere only 30% women can achieve orgasm during intercourse...
Ah well....too much info? :P
BTW, why do people fake orgasms? Now that'd be upsetting to me if my W did that.
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
Now THAT would be tricky to hide if Mom popped by unannounced.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
Hmm..that sounded like someone washing their hands of me.
Naw.. i just dont have too much to say, then, if that's your path.
PS: i dont think you asking about the present "from both of you" was dumb. and I think it's nice that he said "okay". that means he's still ok with that sort of thing. and thats why you asked in the first place
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
Some men may get their ego bruised, but that's just selfish.
the Adam&Eve website has reviews from customers (kinda like amazon does; stars w/comments) and I was really (pleasantly) surprised at how many *guys* bought the products for their SO and then wrote glowing reviews about watching their women have fun.
I'm not sure what my H would think; I mean, we had a couple very simple toys that were used maybe a few times. The few times they were incorporated it seemed awkward. (Probably why it was only a few times.) I think that since he was good at making sure I finished, there didn't seem to be a need to get over any awkwardness.
You know, I always thought it was *him* that didn't like things that were out of the ordinary. (I'm thinking of the toys right now.) I always thought I was more adventurous than him. BUT, I wonder if that was because I projected that idea on him ("he doesn't like different things") and then was inhibited because I was assuming he wasn't enjoying himself. And I am sure, if I was kind of reserved and shy, he probably wasn't enjoying himself as much as he could have if I would have not given a hoot what his 'thoughts' were.
Hmmm...believe it or not, I think this is actually something important. Not specifically to our sex life; but more to the point about intimacy. Why didn't I feel free enough to just enjoy what I wanted to enjoy? Why did I inhibit myself and second guess what he wanted? Not that I was denied enjoyment, but I would "judge" whether I thought he was having a good "enough" time and if I didn't think he was, I would put the kibosh on it. Aha- I can summarize it in one sentence "I feel guilty when I am having more fun than the other person; especially if I think it's at the expense of the other person." Is that true with all women?
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
PS: i dont think you asking about the present "from both of you" was dumb. and I think it's nice that he said "okay". that means he's still ok with that sort of thing. and thats why you asked in the first place
thanks Dom.
I was starting to think that all the vibrator talk made my post get lost in the shuffle.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
oh, ps: Some women DO report that direct mechanically assisted clit stimulation, then gets it used to that artificially intense frequency, and it is then more difficult to enjoy human level stimulation.
different women, are different.
Quote:
Why didn't I feel free enough to just enjoy what I wanted to enjoy? Why did I inhibit myself and second guess what he wanted?
because you care about your husband's feelings, and that is a GOOD thing. dont second-guess your choices about that now. you made the right choice, presuming that you were listening to things that he actually SAID, vs things that he MIGHT have said.
(possibly, your approach might have been better. for example, some men enjoy getting to play with something "together", rather than feeling "replaced". ("power tools" for them to use? heheh) but some men dont like that stuff at all.) you gotta ask, is all)
Last edited by Dom R; 08/22/0703:58 PM.
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
Agent99, be careful of A&E products. They tend to be the low end stuff that break really easily. Also, certain material they use contains phthalates which is toxic. Most recommend not using them or put a condom around the toy. Another good place is called http://www.goodvibes.com I think.
M: 31 W: 31 M: 7 T: 8 S:4 D:2 Bomb dropped: too many to count or remember, 12/17/07 last one S on 9/2/07 W sent off D papers 12/31/07. Me trying to live life and hope she returns one day.
dave, I see a lot of the same products on the site you posted that are on adam and eve. how do you know what products are made of the stuff you are saying are toxic???
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
Most recommend not using them or put a condom around the toy.
What has the world come to when even our toys need condoms?
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing