Lessons from a former WAS

[thegoodfight]

My W. did not pull away but you could tell she was off guard. Unfortunately so many people just believe D. is the answer to all marital issues. Just walk away and start fresh it will all be better.

I wonder to myself how do you figure especially when Kids are involved. I don't blame her for her choice it is just that her sisters situation certainly has not helped matters at all. I don't know I just hope so goes to see a professional for herself so she can work issues out.

I decided I would hang in there until the end and make her life as comfortable as possible for my S. for her and finally for me. It is similar to when someone is taking morphine for the pain just before expireing. Unfortunately our issues do not have to be relationship ending, but since I can not control her feelings, I try and do the next best thing.

I was talking with her a little last night about when she was pregnant. Funny clue came out of it she remembers me as not that into it. I gently said wow, I remember it differently and citied all the hospital visits talking to her belly at night, picking out stuff for the babies room, building the crib. Looking at sporting equipment when I found out it was a boy and jumping up and down after we found out. I also said if that is how you remember it that is fine, my memories are very different.

My point is when things are bad, it appears even past experiences with that person are remembered in a different light. Again I think they (the ones who want out) are just validating their feelings and making themselves believe this has always been a problem. Sad, because despite her wanting gone, I remember the good times still. She had a wonderful pregnancy, she was very happy and was not sick at all. We had fun together, she asked to see the tape of when our S. was born, I think it would be good for her to see that again especially since she asked for it.

I know something is bothering her very badly, if you make a decision and you are comfortable with it, should it not give you some peace and allow you some rest?