Trying to set those goals!

[Dom R]

Well, the NOW is because "something" is missing.

ugh.

"We didn't get married for the right reasons. I knew that you would be a good mother to my son. I really liked you, had a good time with you, our sex life was good and I figured that I could help you raise your daughter. I thought we would be a good family and help each other out."

Sounds like pretty durn fine reasons to ME.
I wonder what he thinks "the right reasons" would be now?

your "what if.." theory could be right, if you want to tackle things indirectly.
If you want to tackle things more DIRECTLY though...

I think that what I said earlier today, is probably why.
I think he's looking for "fun and excitement, now that he's 'free' from children".
His priorities when you got married, were for family, and stability. Now he wants to try "fun and excitement".

Nothing inherently wrong with that... its just sad that he decided to look ELSEWHERE for it, instead of joining with you for the hunt for it.

If you want to play the "I'm going to go dark and sit here and wait until he comes back" game... you could be waiting for a loong time, until he gets tired of looking for "fun and excitement".


OR.. you could start offering him more "fun and excitement" yourself.

YOU have to be a little worn out from the whole "looking after children" thing too. and marriages are SUPPOSED to evolve as both people grow and get older.. right? So.. look to have fun now!

I'm still thinking that you need to be more "aggressive".
But maybe not a "booty call" by itself.
Maybe you need to make your own date with him.
Ask HIM out.
Think of something he almost couldnt possibly refuse. Some kind of "dream date" for him. (a racetrack racing lesson? something really unique and wild)

Then, if the date goes well.. take him home.... and jump his bones.
Then you wont be breaking your "date me first" rule, AND you can show him a more aggressive, active you