I think it is clear that differentiation allows for MORE emotional connection rather then less. So there is nothing to fear about differentiation reducing emotional connection.
I don’t think that is what is meant by more emotional connection. The greater connection comes about precisely by what I am saying, that two differentiated people can stand on their own independently without leaning on one another (as a conscious choice to be close) and not worry about whether the other will pull out his/her support. The lack of that fear is what allows greater emotional connection. Fear limits connection.
You don't become non-reactive to be differentiated. When you are differentiated, then you become less reactive.
Maybe, but what lesser amount of reactivity is sufficient? The ideal is to not react at all and accept the other person as s/he is, as Corri states. Anything else implies judgment of some level, or you wouldn’t react in the first place, right?
