It sounds like you are really struggling with the results of your choices. I really am sad to see you hurting. you'll never know how sad. I wish I could be there for you, but it seems like this is stuff you need to try to work through on your own. I know it isn't easy, the stuff I am working through on my own sure isn't, but I think it will be worth it in the end. I hope the same is true for you. I hope you find yourself again...you are worth finding.
I appreciate very much your telling me that you don't hate me because you are right, it does often feel like you do. I hope it never comes to that for either of us, no matter what happens in the future. we have 3 beautiful, wonderful kids, and we will have ties together forever because of them. I have to say, I am proud of how well we have been co-parenting so far. Its not easy, I know, but I think at least there, we are doing a good job, all things considered. even (my therapist) has commented that we are doing remarkably well with it.
I'm not getting rid of anything. just consolidating, and have packed it all away in the basement. It was hard going thru, but glad I did.
take care, m.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
