Sex and Validation

[Burgbud]

It's like the monkey-girl part of my psyche will be yelling out from the merry-go-round of sex to the cow/lion part of my psyche something like "Look at me. I'm having fun!"

That seems okay. It would be a problem if it was the bunny-girl part of your psyche yelling out, "Look how much he digs me! He must really be into me if he's willing and able to do all this!!"

It's like I'm convinced that there's only one house in town that has good crack because I associate the dopamine or oxytocin high with all the sensual specifics and context of the moment.

I can see how that would be an issue for me as well, or anybody really, not just you. That's where the self-validation comes in...believing you can get that again from somebody else and do a pretty good job yourself in the meantime. Having the ability to look forward to repeating the event rather than needing it with a hint of desperation.

I would say that maybe I should follow your suggestion and engage in some non-fantasy oriented MB but the fact is that I don't feel much urge to MB at all without fantasy.

That's a little bit of a red flag because it makes it seem like you're not in it for the sensations, you're in it to have someone else willing and able to provide you those sensations.

Btw, I have a friend who can make herself squirt using her rabbit. I'm guessing one would have to be totally in the moment, concentrating on themselves, without the distraction of fantasy, in order to make that happen. Take it as a challenge and let me know how it goes...