Now, in defense of everyone who is struggling with this, I will say again, it is HARD. And the hardest part about it, I think, is eliminating EVERYONE ELSE from your list. Like I said, it took me months to figure it out, and I'm STILL working on it.
GGB. Nope, you still missed. So did you, LM. (LM, no offense, but you are running way ahead. You gotta start with this exercise, first )
GGB: I don't care how you carve up your day, making time for this, that or the other thing (or groups of people in your life, i.e, kids/wife). I have no doubt you are all devoted family people. The problem with the exercise is that you are so concerned about being seen, by yourself and others, as a devoted, caring member of your family... that you no longer have any sense of self.
Okay. So, when I was struggling with this, the same way you all were... my shrink said to me... 'let's say you had a day to yourself. All your chores and work were done. Your family was away, your friends were away... and it was JUST YOU. What would you do that would make you happy?"
Most of my answers revolved around a restful activity, like reading a book, watching a movie, listening to music... all of which are PASSIVE activities. (Cobra's were a little passive as well... but he also has specifics in his list.. like going camping. Walking along an ocean shore is kind of vague... I'm assuming there was some planning involved that got you to A SHORE (which one), and there was some reason you were going... and you had some vague sense of what ELSE you wanted to do while at the shore... unless you like walking all day) So. I was nixed. Again.
"There is nothing wrong with relaxing and recharging your batteries. But... that is relaxing and recharging your batteries. So, now, let's say you are relaxed and your batteries are recharged, and STILL, your friends and family are still away, your work and chores are STILL done... what would you do?"
Now, please don't argue with me, like I did with my shrink, at how unrealistic this scenario is (because it is). That isn't the point. You still have to answer the question.
Quite honestly, Lou's second list, after he started dropping out other people from it, is pretty specific. Maybe take a look.
Try again, GGB. You say you like the feeling of accomplishing something. <-- what's the very specific something? Is it the thing you would do, first, if your friends and family all went away for a week, and all your work and chores were done?
Once you get one thing on the list... I think that is great. But one thing... just isn't going to cut it.
)
