finally heard from H on one of my e-mails. he didn't bother responding to any of them except for the one on friday. my sister was supposed to come into town with her girls, just for the day, so I had asked to keep the kids till saturday. she isn't coming now, so checked to see if he wanted them on friday as usual. expected him to have plans, actually, but I gave him the option. he wrote, "That sounds good, thanks"
nothing on my other e-mails. granted, they were pathetic and probably didn't really need responses. I was a bit high on the passive-agressive/manipulative/sad/hurt/angry scale with them. an example:
have been going thru boxes of stuff today, found a bunch of old pictures/cards. guessing you don't want any, but if you want one or two as a keepsake, let me know.
I know we are in completely different places right now. I really do understand that. its just going to be hard for me for a while, but I'll get there. I will. I just hope we can do this without hating each other in the end. I don't want to hate you, h. I'm going to do my best to stop loving you, but I really don't want hate to take its place.
I appreciate your honesty this morning. I know it wasn't easy for you. thank you. hoping it will help eventually.
take care,
m.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
