Man, I know just how you feel, about one minute they say they are not kicking you out, and then the next it's like when are you leaving?
My W is/was the same way, as I was preparing to leave, tried to act like she cared if I had a place to stay, but all the while being as cold as the other side of the pillow. One minute telling me I'm a horrible person, and a terrible dad, the next crying her eyes out, when I tell her (in my stupid depressed state) that I would just give up all my rights to the kids) She also filed for the D, and thinks she can control me, but now with my new career, the tables will be turning very soon.
That is the mindset of the WAS, they want you out, but don't want to let you go, and they want to control every aspect of your life after you leave, for me it's been 6 months, since I moved and in that time, W, has tried to drive me crazy! DIDN'T WORK! I now realize, that SHE IS THE ONE WHO IS OUT OF HER MIND!, even though I am the one in C, it takes a sane person to know when they need help, something she still hasn't admitted. It takes a sane person to know what they really want, something she still has no clue about. Just remember this, IT'S NOT US! IT'S THEM!
WE ARE THE SMART ONES! We are the ones who are getting it together, WE RECOGIZED OUR PROBLEMS! and are trying to fix them, no matter if the M, fails or not. AT LEAST WE WON'T CONSCIOUSLY MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES AGAIN! and THE TRUTH IS WE ARE THE ONES WHO ARE TRULY IN CONTROL!
Now, I can only speak for my sitch, but I can already see, that W, hasn't learned anything yet, she is still having the same R, that we had, just with a real bum (the OM) Oh, well, there is nothing I can do, until she sees that SHE NEEDS TO WAKE UP AND MAKE THE CHANGES FOR HERSELF!
Here's an interesting side note on that on Friday, as I was picking up my DD11, from her school, I was talking with a guy, who's been D'ed for 10 yrs, he told me that his ex-W has been M'ed, twice after the D, while he has been living with his current GF for the past 9 yrs. I can see my W, doing the same thing, not getting M'ed, but moving from one loser to the next.
THE TRUTH IS THEY ARE ON A NEVERENDING DESTRUCTIVE CYCLE, it will continue till they open their eyes, and realize THEY ARE KILLING THEIR R'S! Some will wake up, and some won't. All we can do is KEEP ON THE PATH OF MAKING US BETTER, and KEEP PRAYING FOR THEM to do the same. Take care.
