Yes, I think it's sad lines have become fuzzy and people make excuses for weakness so it becomes okay to bend or break commitments like marriage. Anyone can come up with an angle to validate their behavior and make it okay. Perhaps in the future there won't be such a thing as "marriage." Maybe there will be other legal options like "1-year hook up." People will lease relationships the same way they lease apartments.
I can't say I'm so kind... but I do try to be fair and I did try to look at things from OW's angle. If I would have sensed even a little bit of remorse, regret, caring for others... anything remotely selfless, I would have had a tad of emphathy for her. But I didn't get anything like that from her.
Strangely, I was kind of disappointed my husband was such a poor judge of character to pick this type of person to leave his marriage over. During the divorce I was very concerned about what type of girlfriend my husband might choose, and if he'd start living with someone quickly and begin exposing my kids to that.
In fact, at one point during the divorce (keep in mind this was back when he was 100 percent certain he was divorcing me) I even mentioned to him that he should set me up on some dates with great guys he might know, and I could pick out some great women for him. That way we could ensure that we both like any potential step-parents. Now am I weird or what????
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
