Re dating. I am really not going to try to tell you what to do here. I'd suggest that you avoid actual involvement with anyone (virtual or IRL) until you are Done trying to reconcile. You'll know.
As for dating sites, I'd avoid the Match, Yahoo, and the like. There are lots of predatory people out there, and they seem more prevalent on those sites than on some other sorts of sites. At least they did when I was dating. There are plenty of single and married men just trolling for quick sex.
I'd recommend lovehappens (an ancestor of the site where I found H). If it still works the same, then it has compatibility matching tests that really do a good job. Also, it has lots of other online tests that people can share (all sorts of both serious and fun tests). I love psychological tests in general, so it was a great site for me. And, call me an elitist snob, but I screened by I.Q. (I actually felt pretty bad about that, but at the same time I knew that I wanted to date very intelligent men.)
I think eharmony is also known for good compatibility tests, but they probably don't have all the other tests.
