I am just catching up again with your sitch. I am sorry things have not worked out better for you but its a fact that we cant chage another persons course in life no matter how much we want too. The road ahead will not be easy but it needs to be travelled. Now is the time to accept that your H has chosen his path and leave him too it. Is there hope? who knows but there is one thing that comes out of your posts and that is your H does not like to be pushed. If you have the strength to do one thing I think you may try it and that is accepting your H's decision and letting him know through your actions that you have accepted it . It would be a 180 ? It will also pay dividends for your continued relationship as parents of your children.
