Eh, Astimegoeson doesn't seem to think much of me. ;\) But waiting for universal popularity is about as useful as lips on a chicken, so I'm not worried.

No, my husband and I have not read DR...but from what I've picked up about it, he instinctivly knew how to DB pretty well. A very unusual and singular man, my husband . I don't think I was ever delusional enough to pretend HE was abandoning ME. And I didn't really think he was manipulating me so much as circumstances. He knew how to upset me and occasionally pushed my buttons to make sure I knew he wasn't happy with me. At one point while I was away (without OM) for my brother's wedding, my husband really hit below the belt. He sold my two cats, which were like family to me, without telling me until I got home. I was devastated, but he had made his point too. There were a few other attacks, but mostly he just refused to support me; if I wanted to be my own woman then fine, but he'd have no part in it. He was good at documenting what I was doing, where I was, etc. This was mostly to get the OM into trouble since they're both soldiers and the military takes adultery very seriously. It made it easier to catch me if I lied too.

Like I said in a previous post, deep down I knew my husband was a better man than my OM. I was torn by the fantasy, but still wanting my husband. He loved me, and I knew it, but I couldn't reconcile it with my "love" for the OM. I was confused and throughout the whole mess I was fighting for happiness. I just didn't always know what that meant.

At first I didn't hear anything my husband said. I didn't want to hear anything that might punch holes in the fantasy. But I hears it, even when I pretended not to. And it ate at me. I carried what I was doing to my husband with me every moment of every day.

The thing that my husband kept repeating is that he did not want a divorce, that it wasn't his choice.

The grass may be greener, but then again, it may also be astroturf.
~Amy C Brown