You are devestated because you have been waiting around for years for this to sort itself out so that your life is better.
You need to make your life better regardless of what happens to your sitch. SO is not going to fix your life. Time to become an independent adult and take care of yourself.
Extract yourself from this sitch. Quit relying on him and his family.
(1) Get legal child support in place. (2) Move. (3) Get a job. (4) Get loans to get the training you need. (5) Get training. (6) Get a better job.
No more excuses. Quit waiting for SO to fix things. Fix them yourself. Now.
