All of your H's complaints sound a lot like mine. I too had a HUGE sex drive, suddenly realized how sexy H was still to me, etc. Just keep going and stay positive. The insecurities will show and slow progress. I know, easier said than done, but just be happy \:\)

Me: 38
H: 35
S4, S5, S10
Bomb 01/07
Wanted D - nothing would change his mind
Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb
Piecing 04/07
Deployed for a year 05/07
Still Piecing 2010
M 11 yrs 05/10