It is difficult to live at first, but if you keep practising you will find it works. Having expectations of other people is HARD WORK. Once you stop doing it you discover how much wasted effort you have put in over the years trying to get them to live up to your expectations. The point is the other person if they are an averagely decent person WILL do stuff because they expect it of themselves. So leave them to it. They are in charge of them and you are in charge of you.
Remember how it bugged you when your H kept hinting to go for a picnic. What bugged you was him having an expectation of you. It ruined what had been a spontaneous gift and turned it into something he expected you to live up to. Turn that round to the things you are expecting him to do - see how much harder work it makes it for him to do them?
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
