It's scary to feel something new and not be able to define it rationally. Your C thinks your window is closing, and s/he may be right. The timeline is interesting, too: 4--6 weeks sounds pretty precise. I assume s/he arrived at that based on previous experience; who knows where you'll fall in (or outside) there.
I'm not in your shoes, and I'm at an earlier stage, certainly. I have the same question SD does:
Originally Posted By: SuperDad
Could this be what detaching really feels like?
I'm not sure where the line is between detaching and moving on in our own minds/hearts. How is it possible to be committed to saving your R when you're detached? It sounds like pure will, void of all emotion. No one wants to act on emotion, but we surely feel it. When we're detached and stop feeling it, where's the motivation? Or is detachment a strategy we use, or a trick we play on ourselves, so that when/if W/H comes around, we can plug back in to our desire to fix the M? Maybe that's the line your C referred to.
I'm thinking out loud here, but it's something I've been wondering about. Maybe someone who's gone through what they consider true detachment can comment. I'd be interested. You say you're "mourning the loss of your M," and that sounds like moving on to me.
Maybe walkingcliche is right and you intellectualize to your detriment. I wonder the same about me. I wonder if I'm not intellectualizing myself right out the door.
How do you feel about your C's timeline? Are you feeling anxious to move on, maybe get some relief from all this? I always think I have to hold out for absolutely as long as I can, and then hold on some more. The reason your C gives for pushing it sounds like a valid one. Thankfully you're in control of this one.
Originally Posted By: Nomopo
I think another part of me feels like I would be upset with myself if I found out that if I had just been patient things would work out.
And how, pray tell, would you find that out?
Take care, Nomopo. I wish you everything good. And I know I'm not alone in hoping you stick around: your steady voice is a blessing here.
