Lessons from a former WAS

[PhD_ChrisD]

GoodFight, thanks for sharing with us the "other's perspective." I read all of the postings and it is sad. I was most interested in the fact that you said your W just gave you the time to "work things out for yourself" as being a big reason for you coming back. Thanks for that, I may tell my own WAW the same thing. It also gave me hope that my W will come to her senses.

One thing that troubles me is the forgiveness part. I am not a "forgive and forget" sort of person. Every time she stays out all night, I feel more hurt, more wronged, and more betrayed. I am seriously looking at D as a solution. Frankly, I am not sure I have the capacity to forgive and repair the damage. It is an interesting dichotomy: the desire for love and the desire for revenge. I am not even sure if it is revenge so much as it is self-preservation or pain-avoidance.

Best of luck to you. I hope things work out for you.

--Chris