Thanks for stopping by my thread. I'm sorry the thought of OW is still haunting you. I know how that can be. It stinks. It wasn't until I ended up living through more icky affairs, including my own, that I was able to really "get it". I really had a hard time accepting and letting go of the past before. It took a LOT of heartbreak and work. In my sitch, much of that was because my H still wasn't giving me what I needed. Our MC at the time was telling me that was more than likely the case, but I didn't have the guts to really stand up for MY needs at the time. You go girl... speak up, say what you want, own it, your H wants you to be happy with him as much as you want him to be happy with you.
You know, the EMDR therapy is actually an interesting idea CL. I think it'd be worth asking a professional about. Years ago I worked for a psychologist who used that therapy very successfully with some PTSD patients. Very cool technique. You and your M are so worth it.
That was really sweet of your H to write you that email. He really cares. Seems he wants to help and is trying to fix this. The fact he "hates himself" for that "contemplation"... that is what you have been wanting to hear, no?... that he DID in fact do wrong by you and your M. I think you have the right idea... hold onto where he is NOW. Try to keep your focus on the now and the future, while you work on accepting the past. Love the past, because that is what brought you HERE.
You have your own feelings and needs that are yours and yours alone. You will only shine brighter if you give yourself the energy and focus you deserve. What do you want? What does care need?
Me: 37 M: 14 yrs Separated 10/06; Filed for D 12/07 Life is good.
