Exactly! No matter how we may try to differentiate, if we have sex with someone, we will feel some level of connection, otherwise we are a robot. So when rejected, we can not help but feel hurt. True differentiation is only theory, IMO. Sort of like calculus, you can try to approach the limit of differentiation but never actually reach it.
What if I had sex with you and then 2 minutes later I wanted sex again and you said "Sorry, Mojo, not feeling the desire." Should I feel hurt? This is, of course, a ridiculous example but most sane people would say that I shouldn't feel hurt because there would be an obvious reason for your lack of desire that had nothing to do with my desirability. Why does it make a difference if the reason is not so obvious or even reasonable?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
