It may be different for others, but my wakeup call came in my darkest hour.
I would assume that hitting the bottom is the wakeup call for most WAS's. I think that one of the biggest problems with this scenario is that the WAS has no trouble living in a fantasy world, so it takes them a long time to hit the bottom and a lot of times the LBS has given up by then. One of the best articles that I read on infidelity stated that most marriages could be saved after an affair. When divorce occurs, it is because the infidel can not escape the affair in time or cannot face going back into a marriage in which he she is now known and understood and can no longer pose as the white knight spotless and beyond criticism. It went on to say...the prognosis after an affair is not grim, and those who have strayed have not lost all their value. The sadder but wiser infidel may be both more careful and more grateful in the end.
prodigalwife, It really seems that you have grown as a person because of this and understand what pain was inflicted on your H by your choices. You have lived and learned and you are one of the wiser people coming out of this. I wish I could say the same for my H. Everyone really appreciates your insight.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
