I an so sorry to hear about your poor son. I hope that he is in the mend
I was 43 yesterday. The stupid thing is that most of the time I feel as though I am in my mid twenties and then I have a real shock when I look in the mirror!!!!!
I also don't feel old enough or responsible enought to have four kids let alone ones that are the ages they are!!!!
How old are you?
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I feel the exact same way! I'm 35 w/ 3 boys, ages 7, 3 & 1. It absolutely floors me when I actually sit down & think about what has happened in my life in the last 8 yrs or so. And the time goes by SOOOOO fast!
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
It sure does and you are still on the right side of 40!!
As each year goes by the time just flies quicker and quicker. Turning thirty never bothered me but my 39th year was a very unsettled one. Once I was a day past my 40th birthdat tho' I kinda forgot about my age again!!!!
Just got back from watching 'Hairspray' with my girls and that was really nice. The film definately has that foot tapping, feel good factor to it - a bit like 'Grease' I suppose.
Hubby has driven himself and my son down to London to see a soccer game so it was nice to have just a girls evening.
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Man, I'm having such a hard time right now. S3 is still not wanting to take his meds and for some reason he is still running a temp even though he's on antibiotics so I'm having to hold him down & give him the antibiotics & tylenol, etc. I feel so horrible and then of course I'm the bad guy and he wants his grandma.
Oh well, I guess it can only get better. Maybe I shouldn't say that though. The vehicle is acting up too.
Talked to H today and it was the first time in awhile that I actually felt a little friction w/ him. I've tried really hard just to deal w/ stuff over here knowing that it won't help for me to moan & groan b/c he can't do anything from over there to help anyway. I need to remind myself that he is supporting me in his way and that one time told me how proud of me he was for handling everything the way I am. He is probably also frustrated that he CAN'T be here to help. Anyway, it just seemed to cause some irritation between the two of us today.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
I am so sorry that there has been a bit of friction between you and your H. You have a lot to cope with having to deal with the children by yourself and just when you are going to go away for a short break is the worst time for any of the kids to be ill.
I hope today was a better day.
Unfortunately, things carry on being rollercoasterish even when piecing. But remember that to get where you are today you are a stronger person and can deal with all this.
Thinking of you.
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Well, S3 is still not feeling great, but I think he's on the mend finally, maybe, I don't know. We'll see.
Things seem a lot better w/ H today. He even called me during his lunch time which he never usually does.
We're both getting really excited about my trip. I can't believe it's 2 weeks from tomorrow.
I haven't been "dwelling" anymore on all the issues. Not too worried about the last OW/EA or what will happen when H gets back as far as she goes. She's not worth my time.
Sometimes, like I've said before, things sneak in that he said or did during the D sitch and it just still absolutely floors me that MY H did/said those things, but . . . I'm just hopeful that I truly can still love him as deeply and strongly as I want to and I thought I did in order to stick by him through all of this. There are days when I wonder. If I just see him so differently now. I think that just may be that he's gone and I'm having to be so independent with EVERYTHING right now.
I asked him the other night if he worried about coming home at all. All the literature says that the "reunion" time is kind of stressful. I can see that. We will have been living separate lives for a full year -- him by himself and me w/ the boys. It will take a lot of adjustment. He said no that he doesn't worry about it. He said as long as we just communicate. I think one of the main things he has learned from all of this is that he needs to communicated more and better w/ me about his needs, etc.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
The communication thing is very important. It is something that has definately got better between H and I.
No doubt there will be ups and downs but I can see from just going over my postings that I have improved so much and that OW is no longer such a big part of my thoughts.
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Glad S3 is feeling a little better, hope he improves a lot more soon!!
You are doing great not dwelling on things. That's a really tough one for me.
I bet it will be a bit of a new rollercoaster for awhile when H gets home. It's a huge adjustment, for sure! Sounds like you're on the right track talking about it, though.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
I'm doing a horrible job at this single mom thing today. I have S1, S3 & S7. They are wonderful little guys, but sometimes I get so stressed out. I hardly have any time just for me and sometimes I just get totally overloaded and overwhelmed.
Tomorrow will be better.
H and I had more R talk this a.m. over Ichat. I've slowly been asking questions I've decided I actually want to the know the answers to instead of bombarding him w/ questions and then realizing later I didn't really want to know all the details. I asked him if he stayed w/ OW the 2 times he did move out for a few days during the D sitch and he told me no. He has quit denying who the OW was. At first he tried to tell me it was not anyone at work, but I knew who it was from his cell phone.
The first 2 nights I get to Seoul, we will stay in Seoul and he booked us at a hotel as "honeymooners."
He admitted that he guesses he's just kind of being a guy and wanting to say that everything is ok now and just move on. He also understands that I may need to talk about some things and he said he is glad that I feel like I can talk to him now. I am glad too that I feel comfortable talking to him about anything now.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
