You have been dealt a tough hand...more than most of us can even fathom. Which is why I wonder if you're angry and (it feels) distrustful of my sincerity. There is no set pattern once the affair ends. Some people feel better and do better if they cut all ties and have no communication with the ex-OM/OW. For me it would be worse to do so. My problems resulted from not dealing with reality; reality means admitting what happened and dealing with the aftermath. He is not a particularly admirable person, but he had qualities that drew me to begin with. Letting him call me is a constant dose of reality.
Don't paint all women who had an affair with the same brush. We're flawed, we screwed up, but that doesn't mean we want the affair now. I love my husband, I'm glad he stood by me through this...learning experience. I wouldn't trade his love and trust for any man's affection, especially one who already proved his lack of character.
The grass may be greener, but then again, it may also be astroturf. ~Amy C Brown
