Nomopo's Sitch - Patience, Patience, Patience

[Nomopo]

CVA - under the work gun today and the next few as I try to get out of town Saturday with the kids.

Hi Kat. Thanks for the suport. Yeah, patience; I know. I am doing some serious noodling these days, but I will take my time to figure out what this new place I think I am at is all about. It's been four months of pretty good DBing, so maybe this new phase is what happens with time. My guess - more detaching is occuring. You can't rush it though. To truly, and more importantly effectively, detach, you really have to be ok with/prepared for the consequences. I'm getting stronger in that regard every day.

Hi Puddle - welcome to my life! And thanks for stopping by. If your PS question is about my family, yes, we're all in Texas. Or are you telling me you're here too.

Hello bar! Good thoughts, thanks. I may take you up on that nanny thing.

Bar meet Charlie; Charlie, this is bar. You two have something in common.

Charlie (aka strongerthanthis) - hope you had a good time with your buds last night. Good feedback on the pics and the kids. Thanks. Also,

I think something to think about, is do you feel you are at the right place either way the M goes? This could be a good time to 'try something different' My personal opinion is to become their best friend they see how much they like you, then pull back gently and see if they are drawn back again a fine line which I'm not there with yet. A bit of the castle / picnic as I understand it they like you and you are having such a good life without them they want to become part of that.

Good stuff Charlie. Thanks again. I think what may be happening to me is that I really am getting to the spot where I feel I am at the right place either way the M goes. That takes time, but I believe I may have taken a pretty big step forward. Am I all the way there yet, not sure and probably not, but I am doing some meditating on it now.

Hi Still my long-time, dear DB friend and spiritual guide! I was thinking the other day how far I have come since first posting about three months ago! Whew! You are a big part of why I have made so much progress. Do you recognize me still???

the parents being "okay" (not [. . .] denying either their own feelings or the children's) thru it all. It's not just enough to "just love your kids", but to really HEAR them & ALLOW THEM [to talk, vent, cry or express ANY emotion or feeling or thought about it] as they want w/o denying either their thoughts/emotions or denying them the right to have them.

Can you explain this to my W please? Hopefully, CP will.

But VG for your W in being able to talk it out w/you & all the chuckling (I'm jealous)!

Yeah, it was good and thanks for the thoughts on the meaning of the pic removal.

And how many "non-important" phone calls DID W make to you? Hmmm.

A few, I guess.

I think it will mean much more if it (and the phone calls, etc. - which is what I think you were getting at in your last para?) are not a so-frequent thing. Tho I do know you were concerned w/W's LL & being there for her like that. Moderation I think is a good thing now.

I agree and it would mean even more if she initiated contact, doing things, etc. For me, I need to hold off the LL experiment some. I think right now, less is so much more.

Many vent/thinking out loud coming:

Ooops. That was supposed to be mini-vent.

[quote=stillme]And you do SO not need MY "in-depth" analysis of your sitch [is that what you called it?] b/c you are doing so very well all by your own self! But I'm here for you if you like.

I do need it, and I do like it. And especially as I mull over these recent changes I am feeling I will want to bounce ideas off you and others. So stick around, please. I miss you.

Hi T!

[quote=new_attitude]I think you are handling this well by taking the lead on talking to the CP. Let us know how that goes.

You bet! Will do.

Later all,
Nomo