Hey Morgan, about that ab tape. I have lost some weight since my 20th reunion is coming.....and I am sometimes depressed.....and I lose my appetite when my mom says things about them.....yeah. Anyways, I still have ...um...not tight abs. You had twins... How do I...ya know..... Write back!
babies take a toll on abs, don't they? seriously. my therapist and I were even talking about it today...just very few women avoid the mush. even the skinniest women I know who had kids still seem a bit flabby there. but most guys I know don't mind a little softness in women in general. hoping my ab tapes helps some...it feels like it is, but like I've said, my 20s are long over. I'm never going to be that again, but I can be the best 40 I can be! and part of that is doing that damned ab tape....like I said, it slows me down and makes me spend more time than I would on my own. classes at the gym help, too, and I'm considering finally giving pilates a try. I hear that is awesome.
with your martial arts background, I'm guessing you are in pretty good shape overall. I used to love tae bo...should haul out my old tapes. I remember that really seemed to be a total body w/o. and really good on my abs and my ass. oooh...maybe I'll haul one out later today. already did my ab tape. my daughter insists on doing it with me...very funny, hard not to laugh.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
H just called to say goodnight to the kids. he was very short with me...oddly so. I'm not saying we have this great relationship, obviously we don't, but he was short to the point of sounding angry about something. the same was true when he called this morning. my question is, should I call him back and ask him what is up?
my instinct is that you all are going to tell me not to, but at the same time, I'm just not sure. over the past winter, I knew something was up but figured he was just stressed at work. I asked a couple of times, but never pushed. am wondering if me just coasting, not asking, is that just me falling into the same old pattern? should I call back and try to find out what is going on?
Its really irritating me, actually. I guess its just reminding me that even though I've been feeling pretty okay this week (probably because he hasn't been around), we are still in crap-land. I can push him aside, try to move on with my life, etc, but it doesn't mean he actually goes away...he's still there. (does that make sense)? and I'm probably irritated because wtf does he have to be irritated about? that I'm living my life without him? well, he doesn't want a part of it. I suppose it comes down to the same old, same old, he's angry because I'm not doing the hard part...aka, asking for the divorce. or maybe he's not mad at all, maybe she really is there, even though he said she wasn't going. maybe she's there and he doesn't want to sound chummy to me. or maybe its because his buddy is there, and same thing, he doesn't want to sound chummy with me?
or maybe I'm doing exactly what my friend keeps telling me not to...stop thinking for him. stop answering the questions for him. but then again, would asking him the questions really be a good idea?
so wwyd?
Last edited by morgan; 08/14/0710:20 PM.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
I can push him aside, try to move on with my life, etc, but it doesn't mean he actually goes away...he's still there. (does that make sense)? and I'm probably irritated because wtf does he have to be irritated about? that I'm living my life without him? well, he doesn't want a part of it. I suppose it comes down to the same old, same old, he's angry because I'm not doing the hard part...aka, asking for the divorce. or maybe he's not mad at all, maybe she really is there, even though he said she wasn't going. maybe she's there and he doesn't want to sound chummy to me. or maybe its because his buddy is there, and same thing, he doesn't want to sound chummy with me?
or maybe I'm doing exactly what my friend keeps telling me not to...stop thinking for him. stop answering the questions for him. but then again, would asking him the questions really be a good idea?
Lordy Morgan, my head is spinning with all these "maybe this and maybe that" scenarios!
Lights, Camera, Drama!!!!!
Slow down and stop trying to write his part in the script.
Breath in, breath out, breath in, breath out, wax on, wax off, wax on, wax off.
BTW, say "wax off" real fast 10 times!
Don't call him!!!! Your pursuing and that's not attractive. Your to busy with your exciting life to worry about his miserable one.
Just Chill dude!!!
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
he has had a handful of real moments of remorse...its been a while, but I could see it was real...I could see HIM again, it was almost like a veil lifted. my problem was, instead of letting him actually feel bad/remorseful, I would brush it off...seriously. there was a moment in april where he was crying on the couch, a real, honest moment, saying he was so sorry. what did I do? well, I immediately pulled him into my arms, shushed him, comforted him, and, well...well...comforted him. its like I just thought it would all go away. which, of course, it didn't.
I need to stop having conversations for him. I need to allow him to feel whatever he needs to feel, and I need to let him walk this path that he has chosen. I kind of have this vision of him standing at a fork in the road this past spring, and he ended up going down her path. he could still turn around, could still go back to that fork and choose differently, but nothing I do, other than DB, will make a difference. I suppose I could pursue, but that would only chase him further down the road. really, the db principal of getting my own life seems to be the only thing that I can do. he might remember all the good things along my path (gee, I'm really beating this metaphor to death, aren't I?). but the long and the short of it is, he has to do it on his own.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
feeling pretty good today. this is going to sound silly, but I forced myself to wear something pretty to bed last night. I've found myself reverting to t-shirts, but forget it. I need to feel pretty, non-troll-like, and it seems like such a shallow thing, but I felt better for it. going to keep remembering that. going to remember even though I'm on my own, its nice to look/feel good.
off to the gym, then going to enjoy this beautiful day. feels like summer is really winding down here in new england...probably one of our last hot days. am meeting up with some friends at the swim club later...probably the last day there. I am happy to say I didn't let summer pass me by. I didn't sit and wallow and feel sorry for myself. well, I may have, from time to time, but I didn't let it paralyze me.
happy to say I did not end up calling H last night. he hasn't called yet this morning, and I'm actually not fretting/letting my imagination run wild.
so we'll see what today brings. I'm determined to make it a good one.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
Hey Morgan, now that summer is winding down, you need to wax your snow skies and get them ready. Do they wax snow skies? I use to wax my surf board. I've never been skiing/snow boarding, but my S14 has and he wants me to go with him this Winter. I'm interested in trying it, but will start out on the bunny hill.
BTW, you looked great in that nightwear! Have fun today!
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
Have fun today!