Olive, I'm so sorry that this all happened. Given my experience with my H, I'll try to help. I still think your H doesn't know what he wants. He is in denial and as long as you go along with it...he will continue to live like that. He doesn't want to lose you, but he doesn't want to fix himself let alone your marriage. Relationship with OW is easy...no expectations, no history, no hurting, etc.
I went through a similar stage with my STBXH. As soon as he felt me pulling away, he would start to lead me on...just enough to give me a little bit hope...but not enough to make himself feel bad about still being with OW. I don't think that you really want to be in a relationship with a man who can't be with just you and only you. Your husband as he is today, can't. He is broken and he will continue to be broken until he is ready to fix himself and he is the only one that can do that. I think that you need to do LTR and detach, detach, detach.... He needs to think that you are moving on.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
