Thanks Faith, I will check out that questionnaire. I don't have a lot of faith that he will do it, only because before DB, I had asked him to read books with me on relationships and see a therapist and he refused.
That is a good idea about asking him what changes he would want from me. I know a few already (what our main issues were before OW came along), but maybe it would be good for both of us. I have a list for him (LOL), but will hold back until I know he is fully committed to me.
I am very proud of you for asking H to leave. Its so hard, but sometimes you get to the point where you need him to go. If H decided to leave, I honestly would be fine with it. Thanks to DB, and feeling stronger these days, I wouldn't be a major wreck. I would miss him to pieces, but in a way, he isn't really here anyway (physically he is, just not emotionally).
Hope you have a good night. I am sure H will be looking for all those good changes, and wondering what's going on in your life.
