Trying to set those goals!

[Trixi]

Now for the bad news--it affects my H, but is not driven by my H.

H's son (my stepson, now-20years old) was speaking with my mother the other day. (He/We had custody of SS for 10+ years, so I am his Momma, my daughter is his sister, my mom his grandmother-in his eyes.) AnyHOO, he is very angry at his dad for leaving, blah blah blah...The important thing that he said (which may have been exagerated-he loves drama) is that my H's parents never liked me, my daughter, my family and said that we were low class. SS went on and on about how materialistic they are, and snobby, etc etc and that H is being WAY too influenced by them. (This could also account for why H has said that our relationship is between US and that we shouldn't listen to what our parents have to say.)

I haven't asked him *what* they said about me (don't want to know) but I *do* know that it makes me feel uncomfortable at the prospect of ever being around them again.

What really ticked me off is when SS said to H's mom "My sister wants me to stay with her the first weekend I am there" and H's mom says "Who are you talking about?" when SS says my daughter she says "<scoff> Why would *you* consider *her* your sister?!"
(Keep in mind my H adopted my daughter and we lived together as a family for about a decade.) What a beeotch!!!!

Of course, now that MY mom has heard this from SS, she is pissed. If H and I reconcile, I can *hardly* wait for family gatherings..NOT!

My mother keeps asking how I "feel" about what was said, what I "think", etc. I'm not taking the bait. I basically said that I couldn't give less of a sht what those people thought, and that if H and I get back together, I guess I'll need to sit down and have a little chit chat. My in-laws are less than helpful. BOO!