Need advice on WAW with OM

[svejk]

Hi Sandi2,

Thanks for your input. I think you may be right about the romance addiction. My wife has even mentioned a couple of times that she wants someone just like me except "new". I don't know if this is part of it but she also craves the attention she gets from guys chasing her.

Unfortunately I think most of this is my fault because I wasn't exactly the most romantic husband. She complained sometimes about the lack of romance and attention, and maybe I got a little too comfortable and didn't think I had to romance her as much as she wanted. I used to even say stupid things like "you have unrealistic expectations of a relationship" and "you want to live in a fantasy world."

She always mentions to me that she wants to be treated like a princess and a flower. I know this sounds kind of conceited on her part, but she doesn't mean it that way. She just wants to be treated like a lady and this is her way of communicating it.

I'm not sure what to do about it now, because when I try being romantic/attentive now it is perceived by her as smothering and too pushy.

The only plan I have now is too keep up the LRT and hope that she realizes that once the newness of a relationship wears off there is nothing left with the OM.

I've tried explaining to her that I understand that my shortcomings in the romance department and my lack of complimenting her are a problem, and that I have changed and will always treat her like I should have before. And I really mean it, because I would do anything to never lose her again. But of course talk is cheap at this point.

I completely understand your point about not always being there for her whenever she needs a shoulder to cry on, but it's impossible to say no to her when she is crying. I would rather cut off my arm then tell her I can't be there for her when she's hurting.

By the way, I never sent the letter, and never will, thanks to everyone's advice here.

I don't know if there's anything else I can do at this point to make her see that I can give her the romance and attention that she craves. If you have any ideas about this, please let me know.

Thanks,
Svejk